Day - 174

I get to do one of my favorite things today, go to an Oregon Football game with Doug.

As an added bonus we snuck away for a few nights away from the kids.

I needed to take a little time to digest the last 174 days. And I am pretty sure it will take more than a weekend away to get me there.

Emotionally it has been hard.

Humans, if they live to old age, typically face their mortality 3 different times. First around age 5 when they realize they don't live forever, second when they have their first child and wish they could live forever, and lastly as they reach old age and begin to accept their mortality.

I got the added bonus of facing my mortality at 40.

The good thing is you begin to focus on those things and people you love, and push out all the other bullshit.

Trust me there is a lot of bullshit out there.

The bad thing is that it takes you to very dark places.

The other hard thing, emotionally, is allowing those around you to fall apart and to share deep feelings towards you.

It is weird to feel love expressed because people are afraid you may die.

Let this be a lesson to all of us, cancer is not the only thing that can kill you.

If you love someone let them know.