I had to drag Doug out of bed this morning for my long awaited post surgery visit. He has caught some cold from Harris, and wanted to just lay in bed for the morning.
For some reason I had myself pretty worked up. I was convinced that they were going to tell me my cancer was worse than originally thought, that I would need more surgery, that my days were numbered.
I had committed the cardinal sin of anyone with an illness.
I had Googled.
At the office we chatted with the nurse about my pathology report. She reassured us that chemo had worked, but that it did not completely erase cancer from my body, surgery did that.
But because there may be some microscopic cancer cells out there radiation is the logical next step.
A friend who has gone down this path before told me, "think of it like wearing a belt with suspenders".
Having the drains removed was a cinch after that. All I kept thinking about was, "I am cancer free, I am cancer free."
When we got home I apologized to Doug for making him come to the appointment, I explained that I was so worked up, and was afraid I was going to receive bad news.
He just laughed and said, "you have been an A-1 patient. I am probably going to complain more about this cold than you did after a double mastectomy."
And you know what?
He is right.
Big time healing and dealing today. Drain free!