Day 156

I have been impossible to live with for the last week.  I can't believe any members of my family are still speaking with me.

It is so bad that I apologized to Doug for my grumpiness today. 

He told me he hadn't noticed anything.  That he imagines that I am having a little anxiety over chemo finally coming to an end.  And that I need to just get to that day and work as hard as I can to rid my body of any excess chemo before my surgery.

Subconsciously I think I am afraid for my surgery.  Not so much for the procedure, but for the results.  I just want everything to be ok. 

I want zero cancer in my body.